Have you seen the “Emo Dad” photos? It’s a set of apparent self-portraits of a guy who’s twenty years too old to be sporting the angsty “emo” teenage haircut, pout, piercings and mop top. They’ve been making the rounds on the Internet, and as would be expected, some wag has captioned them:
Yes, I know Canada Day has come and gone, but this perfect animated summary of all things Canadian was too good to let go unposted.
I’d like to wish my American readers a happy 4th of July!
Have a safe and fun holiday, and if you manage to find fireworks like the “This is America” ones pictured above (it’s probably the most powerful thing you can buy at a store without some kind of license – the tube is a mortar, and those things around it are the “shells”), take whatever measures you need to keep all your fingers on your hands!
The Missus and I have started a tradition of going to Ribfest during the Canada Day weekend. A number of barbecuers – a half-dozen to a dozen of them, some from Canada, some from the States as far down as Florida, come to Centennial Park every year to serve the magical meat known as pork and compete for prizes.
Ribfest can get very crowded, but if you time your visit right, you can hit the park when few people are around. We decided to visit on Friday for lunch – the day after Canada Day, but still a working day for many people. The crowds were pretty light, but anticipating that, so was the staffing at all the smokehouses, which meant that we waited for our food for about as long as we would’ve waited for it if the place were crowded. Still, we were pleased to get our hands on some pork ribs.
We generally hop from stall to stall, ordering a half rack from the more enticing ones. Our first stop was Kentucky Smokehouse, who were probably the friendliest crew of the lot and made a tasty half rack.
I enjoyed the ribs at Billy Bones last year, but we didn’t have any this time ‘round. We gave the American ones higher priority, as they seem to “get” barbecue in the way that we just can’t. It’s odd that in Toronto, we’re very good at doing food from the opposite side of the globe, but just don’t have the knack for making barbecue, the food from the country next door.
Aside from last year, when I grabbed barbecue to go from the Ribfest one rainy weekday afternoon, I’ve never seen crowds so light here:
Our next stop was Camp 31, who boasted of having “Alabama’s Finest BBQ Ribs”. We waited in line for 15 minutes and it didn’t budge an inch.
We looked over at the stall to our left, Bad Wolf, who make great ribs. We decided to leave the Camp 31 line and line up there instead.
Bad Wolf make ribs Kansas City style, and they’re quite tasty. They also make a very cake-y cornbread which is fluffy and sweet enough to qualify as a dessert.
Of the three places whose food we tried, Bad Wolf was our favourite this year. Nice meaty racks of ribs, and they were generous with their sauce, which was delicious and had a nice tangy bite to it.
Every stall offered a three-meat-combo featuring ribs, pulled pork and chicken, but Camp 31 had the best name for it:
The line at Camp 31 finally started moving, so we lined up for their ribs/pulled pork combo platter, which came with beans and very creamy coleslaw. While the meat was good, we thought that Bad Wolf edged them out for our vote as our favourite for 2010.
You’ve got a couple more days to hit Ribfest – it’s open today and tomorrow (July 3rd and 4th) from 11 a.m. to 11 p.m. at Centennial Park in Etobicoke:
Not only is Ribfest good fun, it’s also for a good cause. It’s run by the Rotary Club and raises money to support local charities and community organizations, including:
Here’s how they raise that money:
Have some ribs and a good time, and help out the community!
Please note: If you decided to play the video below, I very strongly recommend that you turn down the volume on your computer speakers just before the 1:10 mark. Trust me on this one.
It may be a baby, but it’s still a Great White, and they have a nasty bite.
Back in April, I travelled to Moncton on business and stayed at a hotel where I found this pamphlet on the desk in my room:
As you can see, they didn’t go for more delicate phrasing like “What to do in the event of a hotel fire”. The title’s much closer to “How to not die while staying at our establishment.”
The French don’t have it any easier. The title they see translates to “Hotel Fires!! What to do to stay alive?”
Many of the numbered points in the pamphlet don’t simply use the word “fire”, but accent it with two exclamation marks: “Fire!! in your room” and “Fire!! in another part of the building” are two examples. Perhaps the writer took some inspiration from the band Panic! at the Disco.
“Few people are burned to death in fires.” This is true – in a fire, smoke inhalation is far more likely to (ahem) smoke you than the actual fire itself. I wasn’t disturbed by reading this fact, but I can see some hotel guests being a bit disturbed by being told which method of death was the more likely one.
For some reason, point number seven in the pamphlet reminds me of what just about every electrician trying to make small talk while doing repairs has said to a customer at one time or another, often with a country-fried drawl: “It ain’t the volts that kills ya, it’s the amps!”
“Sure, it’s unethical, but it’s just a business,” says Jordan Kavoosi, who runs Essay Writing Company, one of those places where students who don’t want to write essays or term papers can have someone else do it form them. "I mean, what about strip clubs or porn shops? Those are unethical, and city-approved."
Plagiarism, Inc. is an article about Kavoosi and his company located in the Apple Valley suburb of Minneapolis/St. Paul. It’s an amusing read, what with Kavoosi’s somewhat sleazy line of work, the even more sleazy way he treats his employees and the generally sleazy way in which comes across in the article.
Here are the answers to the question “Why use an essay writing company?”, which appears on Essay Writing Company’s site:
The real answer is much simpler and needs only one bullet point: “Because you’re unethical and lazy.”