Month: December 2017

Pictured above is today’s U.S. weather map, with the temperatures shown using Herr Doktor Fahrenheit’s olde-timey system for measuring phlogiston in the atmo-sphere. It’s a nice and spring-like in Tampa this morning!

Thanks to their being new at things like writing and telling left from right (something that even some fully-formed adults have trouble with), a good number of children write Christmas letters to Satan instead of Santa every year. The Santa/Satan connection has been both a comedy staple and a dire warning from the Christian Taliban for years, but the best version may be this year’s animation, Dear Satan, by Anomaly London. It’s a lovely story, narrated only as Sir Patrick Stewart can, of what happened when Satan got a lovely letter from a child:

Click the photo to see the chilled-out scene at full size.

That’s Sun-Sin, Sourcetoad marketing manager Graeme’s dog, relaxing in our reception area, waiting for our evening holiday party to start.

In case you were wondering, Sun Sin is named after the great Korean admiral Yi Sun-Sin, who is immortalized in the television drama Immortal Admiral Yi Sun Sin.

One reason I love working at Sourcetoad: there’s this friendly face, and that of her sister.

More lifelike and inspiring than the real thing…

Watch the video below and be amazed at how inspiring — and coherent and non-racist! — the newly-installed audio-animatronic version of Donald Trump at Disney World is. Even its motions and hair seem more lifelike than the actual person:

…but still wears his tie like a chump

The audio-animatronic Orange Julius Caesar has a slightly better-fitting suit than his usual ill–fitting ones…

…but the Imagineers took care to make sure that it’s wearing a too-long tie, just like the real person.

You’d think that going to private school and then Wharton, having a father who could provide you a “small loan of one million dollars”, and hanging out with other people who wear ties daily would mean that you know how to wear a tie, but you’d be wrong. In case you were wondering, here’s a tie length guide:

By the bye, I didn’t make up the bit about being on trial in Florida for sport-humping a manatee — it actually happened, and here’s the defendant and his tie:

“Tayla the manatee slaya” is the embodiment of a joke we told each other in university:
“Q: What do you call a townie in a tie? A: The defendant.”

The question remains: Does the audio-animatronic version of Trump tape his tie, like the real one?

Click the photo to see this burning sensation at full size.

Last year, it was all about sending glitter to people you don’t like. This year, it’s about giving “My First Fire” to their kids!

Click the photo to see this burning sensation at full size.

This is a real product available on Amazon, but it’s just a prank gift box and not actually a set for kids ages 2 and up to start their own fires. Ah well.

Click the map to see the original at Judgmental Maps.

“Alex S.’s” map is pretty accurate, and nowhere near as racist as the one for Vancouver. In case you were curious, I live in “Older Suburbs”.