"You see, kitten…when a man and a woman love each other very much, they share a special kind of hug."

This weekend, I’m flying down to Boston, and from there Wendy and I

will drive to the home of our friends Rachel “Velveteen Rabbi

Barenblat and Ethan “Global Bacontarian” Zuckerman. Rachel will be the

rabbi at our wedding (with AKMA as the Christian ambassador), and we’ll

be there to discuss how we’re going to blend Filipino and Jewish

traditions in the ceremony.

There may also be some pre-marriage

counselling involved. Wendy and I have already done our homework; we’ve

listened to this 1950’s recording, The Marriage Union [4.3MB MP3]. Hey, Rachel, maybe you’d like to give this a listen  — y’know, just so we’re all on the same page…

Apparently, back in the 1950s, they thought they could get away

with an adult voice-acting the

part of an adolescent girl. Give it a listen, but be warned — this

piece is so full of treacle and cheese that you might want to keep an

insulin shot handy.

5 replies on “"You see, kitten…when a man and a woman love each other very much, they share a special kind of hug."”

Rachel and I are listening to the recording now. Fortunately, as a type 1 diabetic, I have a refrigerator well stocked with insulin.


If this is the source for guidance that you and my daughter favor, I am VERY worried.


Heh… I made that MP3, back in 1997. I have the two-record 78rpm album (I know there was an LP version as well, but I’ve never seen it for sale), and one day I made MP3s of all four sides and posted them to alt.binaries.sounds.mp3s. I forgot about it after that and misplaced my copies of the files.

Last year, I wanted to hear them again but I don’t have a working 78 player at the moment, so I looked on Kazaa … and found all four, still with the ID3s I’d put in them. Pretty funny that they’ve just been bouncing around the internet all this time. (This one doesn’t have my ID3, but it’s the same file.)

Let me know if you want the other three. “The Problems of Growing Boys” is the best of the series, with its stern warnings against masturbation.

Kim Scarborough

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