If you’re a regular at Kickass Karaoke, you probably know Diandra, pictured to the right in a pirate outfit.
What you may not know is that she was offered a once-in-a-lifetime chance at an interesting job working on a film — in Jerusalem. The job will take her away from our fair Accordion City for a year.
Such a big change deserves a big send-off, which is why we’re having a gathering for her tomorrow night on Queen Street West. We’re going to start off at Lot 16 Bar (1136 Queen Street West, a couple of blocks east of Dufferin), which is probably the most friendly and unpretentious bar on the Drake Strip. Cheap, too!
We’ll probably end up at the Gladstone Hotel (1214 Queen Street West, at Dufferin) for some karaoke. Yes, it’s not going to be a Carson karaoke night, but it will be karaoke nonetheless.
The fun starts at Lot 16 at 9:00 p.m., and Wendy, I and the accordion will be there.
Mankind’s crowning literary achievement or the winning salvo in the war against drugs? No matter which way you look at it Latawnya the Naughty Horse Learns to Say “No” to Drugs [1MB picture file] will haunt you long after you’ve turned the final page.
Click the image above to read the whole story.
“Latawnya, drugs are bad for you,” said Mother and Father horse. “I had a friend who secretly took drugs,” said Father horse. “He accidentally took an overdose and died,” said Father horse.
Someday, “Latawnya” will be as well-known to children everywhere as Goldilocks, Rumplestiltskin or Winnie-the-Pooh.
Video of the Jesus and Mary Chain performing with special guest vocalist Scarlett Johannson.
Well, it’s all over except for the crying and the filling out of riot police reports: this year’s Coachella music festival — a long weekend’s worth of outdoor music from some of today’s hottest alt-rock acts (with a smattering of yesterday’s) — has come and gone.
Friday, 10:00pm: LCD Soundsystem gets the party rolling. James Murphy, looking dashing in a white three-piece suit, informs us that we are “an excellent cultural barometer for the best music.”
I really need to lay down. I hear Red Hot Chilli Peppers in the distance. A girl behind me engages in a loud yelling match with her girlfriend, who I can’t hear: “MY MOTHER IS DEAD!” …. “I DON’T CARE!” …. “I WAS RAPED!” …. “I DON’T CARE!” …. “MY MOTHER DIED!” …. “I WAS RAPED! REPEATEDLY! FOR A YEAR!” …. “I DON’T CARE!” …. “I AM NOT HIGH!”
The lesson: If you want to unearth those repressed memories, put on some Red Hot Chili Peppers.
Saturday, 11:00am: The police were definitely not happy with us. There was much more of a presence, complete with state trooper car parked on an angle just inside the gate. They were being total dicks about what you could bring in, too. No fruit or Advil, apparently. I saw them refuse one guy his allergy meds, because he didn’t bring a copy of his prescription! Regarding my cloth for wiping my glasses:
“What’s that?”
“A cloth.”
“For drugs?”
“For my glasses.”
“Your glasses aren’t dirty.”
[blinks]
The lesson: Apparently sniffing ether-soaked rags has come back into vogue in California.
Sunday, 11pm: Rage Against The Machine hit the stage for the final set of the weekend. What can I say? It was really awesome! I never got to see them before, and watching them do their thing.. it was like they never broke up. There’s a lot of cynical things that should and could be said about them, but I’m glad they have resolved their differences, because at the root of it they are a great band.. and, if someone’s got to scream WAKE UP then it should probably be Zach.
Not one to miss an opportunity, the lyrics to Killing in the Name Of became “some of those who hold office, are the same who burn crosses” [Mary pointed out that you could actually feel the ground shaking] and during the finale when he’s doing his rebellious crouch on the pedestal before his flock, delivering the sermon of the day, it was hard not to feel a perverse excitement when he explained that if the Bush administration was tried under the same laws that the Nazis were, they would be found guilty of war crimes and shot. It continued to be exciting when Zach finished up by restating slightly that we need to try the Bush administration, that they will be found guilty, and They. Will. Be. Shot.
Oh, English! You have so many expressive nuances that can sound so sinister.
The lesson: You’ll get off your ass and vote in the next election, won’t you, hippie?
