The Adventures of Accordion Guy in the 21st Century

With Osama Bin Laden dead, it’s time to bring back this Family Guy scene:

…and I found out from this guy (warning: NSFW language):

(I wonder what it would be like to get all my news from him.)

I expect that we’ll be hearing additional details, such as how long he’s been dead (days? months? years?), the circumstances of his death, and maybe even the formation of the “deather” movement who’ll demand the long-form death certificate.

12 years ago today, my friend Karl Mohr and I took to Toronto’s streets with our accordions. By the end of that day, we’d learned a number of rock and pop hits, joined a hospital cutbacks protest, accepted DJ Todd’s challenge to perform onstage at Toronto’s most notorious goth club (The Sanctuary Vampire Sex Bar, whose owner went by the name of Lance Goth – it’s now a Starbucks) and gotten all the free beer we could drink.

Such a day calls for a happy dance. It might even call for the happiest dance ever invented: Double Dream Feet, shown in the video window above. (And yes, it closes with jazz hands.)

I used to have the story and photos from that first accordion day out on the blog, but it seems to have vanished; it was one of the articles that got lost in the process of changing blogging platforms over the nearly ten years this blog has been in existence (I was first on Blogger, then Blogware and finally, WordPress). I’ll have to rewrite and post the story sometime, but in the meantime, you can hear the story in a presentation I did at CUSEC a couple of years ago called Squeezeboxes, Startups and Selling Out:

Yesterday’s Windows Live Royal Wedding-themed afternoon tea was a hit. The Windsor Arms Hotel has a lovely tea room, a fantastic selection of teas and some very, very addictive scones. Toronto’s lady bloggers and social media mavens, who are excellent company on any day, were doubly so yesterday afternoon. Many of them got into the spirit of the event by dressing up for the event and even wearing tea-worthy hats:

For those who don’t have hats, the tea room at the Windsor Arms provides a nice selection from which you can borrow; they ask that you donate $5 to an AIDS charity if you wear one for a photograph:

Here’s my tech evangelist teammate Ruth Morton modelling her new dress and hat – looking sharp, Ruth!

There was a lot of lively chatter and laughter in the room:

…and let’s not forget my favourite part of afternoon tea: the triple-decker thingy with the food on it:

Since the triple decker food thingies were so gorgeous and since this was a social media gathering, everyone had to snap a picture of them as soon as they arrived:

Global TV were there to get some quick coverage of the event:

After tea and snacks came presentation time. Ruth did the opening presentation, showing off some Windows Live goodies:

I think the hit of the presentation was Windows Live Photo Gallery 2011, and in particular, the “Photo Fuse” feature, which helps you fix photos where someone’s blinking, looking the wrong way or any other such thing by letting you assemble the best photo from a series of photos.

Afterwards, I did my presentation, where I showed off OneNote, Office Live and Bing’s uncanny ability to find embarrassing Kate Middleton photos:

(There are photos of Yours Truly floating about online that are far, far more embarrassing.)

Here’s Ruth, rocking her demo:

…and she was also available after the demos to answer questions and provide a little one-on-one help. That’s what great tech evangelists do!

The formal part of the tea ended with Jen from She Does the City thanking everyone:

And then it was photo time.

Attention Dell Canada! You know who’d be a good spokesmodel for the Inspiron Duo, and who needs a new computer (hers is on its last legs)? Raymi the Minx. She’s widely read, gets lots of hits, and hey, if these photos of her with the Duo don’t get your motor revved, you’re dead inside:

Give us laptop mode, Raymi!

Now table mode!

Now sultry mode!

I’m not kidding, Dell. Hook Raymi up with a Duo and she’ll be your best spokesmodel ever.

We had some prizes to give away. The problem: it was impossible to stump our guests with trivia about the royal couple; they knew far more than we did:

In the end, we had to resort to “Who’s birthday is coming up?” and “Who’s engaged?”

Here are a couple of prize winners, Raymi and Casie Stewart, with their booty:

All in all, a fun event – perfect for my last appearance as a Microsoft developer evangelist. My thanks to She Does the City and High Road Communications for inviting me!

In addition to my temporary change of address this summer (I’m going to be in Ottawa from May 1st through the end of August – here’s why), there will be a couple of changes in the ways I can be reached:

• My old work email, joey.devilla@microsoft.com, will be deactivated this week.
• My old phone number, (416) 948-6447, will be similarly shut down.

Want to reach me? Here are the ways that’ll work:

• My personal email, joey@joeydevilla.com, works just fine.
• I’m still @AccordionGuy on Twitter.
• My new mobile number is (647) 985-JOEY (and “JOEY” is “5639”).
• I’ll publish my new work email (probably joey@shopify.com or something like that) as soon as it’s enabled.

This article also appears in Global Nerdy.

The Build-A-Business Contest is Back!

Spring is sprung, the grass is riz…I wonder where the cool contests is?

Wonder no more. Shopify is bringing back the Build-a-Business Contest. Last year’s contest was a major success:

• It created almost 1,400 new businesses, all of whom were entrants in the contest
• Those businesses’ Shopify stores took in 67,000 orders
• Those orders totalled up to over $3.5 million
• And the winning company, DODOcase (they make cool-looking protective cases for tablet computers) claimed the grand prize of $100,000.

This year, we’ve (See? I’m already using “we”! Do I get my bonus now?) upped the ante. How up is upped? This upped:

I will repeat that: over a half-million bucks in prizes.

“What sorts of prizes are we talking here?” you might ask.

I would reply “Lots. The details of all the prizes are on the Build-a-Business Contest site, but what say we just focus on the grand prize for the time being?”

The Grand Prize, Part One: Filthy Lucre

The grand prize – the ultra-mega-super-Kahuna prize, is so good that I’m beginning to wonder why I took a job with Shopify. Maybe I should quit, open an online store, win the contest and walk off with…

…$100,000 in cash! That’s a nice little bonus on top of the money you can make with your store.

The Grand Prize, Part Two: The Big Apple

However, this is no mere raffle – this is the Build-a-Business Contest, and as I said earlier, we’ve upped the ante!

We think that “a hundred large”, while nice, just isn’t enough. We want this prize to be awesome. Like gangsta rapper video awesome. How about we throw in some trips? Say, to…

…New York City! (If you win, I will give you directions to the coolest obscure little rooftop bar, right in the shadow of the Empire State Building.) We’ll cover airfare, hotel and even throw in some “walkin’ around money”. That’s how hard we rock.

The Grand Prize Part Three: Power Lunch

“But what about food, Joey?” you might ask. “And not just food…I need scintillating conversation with my meal!” I would usually respond by saying “Wow, there’s no pleasing you.” But this is the Build-a-Business Contest, and we’re all about pleasing you, so we’ll throw in:

…lunch with Seth Godin! And no, not some silly thing where you meet at a restaurant; that’s for lightweights. We’ll do one better: Seth will cook you lunch himself. And all you thought he did was write great business books!

The Grand Prize, Part Four: V for Victory

“Not enough!” you cry, and I look at you with great incredulity.

“What more do you want? I’ve given you a hundred grand, a trip to New York and lunch with Seth Godin, which by the way, he is cooking himself.”

“But I’ll need help growing my business! Couldn’t you hook me up with an expert on the subject?”

At this point, I’d slap my forehead in frustration. But this is the Build-a-Business Contest, and we’re going to make it rain by giving you…

…a one-hour power session with Gary Vaynerchuk! Gary’s done a killer job helping other people build their businesses with his advice and books like Crush It! and The Thank You Economy, and now you’re going to get an hour of one-on-one time with him. Gratis. You’ll learn more from him in an hour that a lot of people I know learned in four years of business school.

Here’s what Gary has to say about the Build-a-Business Contest:

The Grand Prize, Part Five: We’re Bringing Plex-y Back

“But that’s only the East Coast, Joey!” you might say. And under normal circumstances, I’d reply by saying “Dude, isn’t that enough?” But this isn’t normal! This is the Build-a-Business Contest! And we will give you the West Coast too, in the form of:

…a trip to Google! As in California. As in a tour of one of the most amazing high-tech campuses in the world. And we’ll also throw in a personal AdWords consultation to help boost your business.

The Grand Prize, Part Six: The Four-Hour Fix

I stand in front of you, my arms wide, wearing a big open-mouthed smile, awaiting your response.

You say: “Okay, Joey, the Build-a-Business Contest grand prize is sixteen different flavours of awesome. But…”

My smile fades. “But…?”

“Couldn’t you…you know…add one more business guru? I mean, you had a couple on the East Coast, and this is the West Coast and all…”

I compose myself and rub my temples, resisting the urge to admonish you for wanting so much. Why? Because this is the Build-a-Business Contest, and our motto is “Go hard or go home”. And we’re not going home!

So I offer one more thing:

…dinner with Tim Ferriss! Tasty food, and a chance to pick the ultimate lifehacker’s brain about The Four Hour Workweek and The Four Hour Body.

“Now are you happy?” I ask.

“Yes,” you reply.

“Good. Now here comes the hard part. You have to win the Build-a-Business Contest, and you need to do the following in order to get your shot…”

The Build-a-Business Contest in Four Steps

It’s pretty straightforward, really:

Are you an artisan? Got a line on some killer sauces and spices? Perhaps you sell accordions? If you have an idea for a business in which you sell things online, you’ve got step 1 down.

On to step two…

We’re cool with giving away prizes, but there’s a reason we’re holding the Build-a-Business Contest: we want you to build online stores using the Shopify platform. It was built with making it easy to start and run an online store – in fact, we were our first customers! Take it for a spin…we think you’ll love it.

Once you’ve done that, the next step’s pretty easy:

You can’t win if you don’t enter. So once you’ve got your Shopify-based online store up and running, enter the Build-a-Business Contest!

And finally:

We don’t succeed if you don’t succeed. So we’re committed to helping you take your Shopify business and grow it. As a tech evangelist with Shopify, I’m going to be part of the team that does just that, and you should check in with this blog, because I’ll be posting lots of advice, tips and tricks for getting the most out of Shopify.

And Why are You Still Reading This?

Don’t get me wrong, reading is good. But you should be scurrying over to Shopify’s Build-a-Business Contest site, where you can get all the details about the contest…

And watch this blog, because I’ll be posting regularly about the Shopify platform, the Build-a-Business Contest and more.

It. Will. Dominate.

This article also appears in Global Nerdy.