Categories
funny

The Seven Minute Rule, as Explained by “Tip Me Over, Pour Me Out”

One of the things I noticed at Tom and Michele’s housewarming party (which I covered in this entry and this entry) was that the people there, whether or not they realized it, seemed to be observing the Seven Minute Rule, pictured below:

Excerpt from the webcomic “Tip Me Over Pour Me Out”: “The Seven Minute Rule”
Click the comic to see the full version on its original page.

As the comic excerpt above puts it:

…if you’re a girl with a boyfriend and you meet a guy at a party, you MUST make a reference to your boyfriend within the first seven minutes of conversation.

Girls with boyfriends are shameless abusers of the long-flirt. Since they already have someone to go home to, they don’t have to float from guy to guy searching for meat. Because of this, the guys they talk to mistakenly believe the girls are interested in them, ESPECIALLY when they talk for hours without mentioning their boyfriends.

The excerpt above comes from Tip Me Over, Pour Me Out, an autobiographical webcomic written by Raphael Bob-Waksberg and illustrated by Lisa Hanawalt. Being a rather relaxed kind of guy, I find neurosis highly amusing and Bob-Waksberg’s ability to tell a funny yarn makes it doubly so (he’s part of a comedy troupe called Olde English). Tip Me Over, Pour Me Out has been finding its stride in its most recent episodes; I’m going to be keeping an eye on this webcomic.

Categories
Accordion, Instrument of the Gods It Happened to Me

More Accordion Photos from Tom’s Birthday / Tom and Michele’s Housewarming

If you missed the first set of photos, they’re in this entry.

One More Accordion Convert…

I didn’t get a photo of Anneke trying out the accordion, but Michele did:

Anneke playing Joey deVilla’s accordion
Click the photo to see it on its original Flickr page.
Photo courtesy of Michele Perras.

…and Me!

We can’t forget Yours Truly, pictured below in his Accordion Happy Place…

Joey deVilla playing accordion at Tom Purves’ and Michelle Perras’ housewarming
Click the photo to see it on its original Flickr page.
Photo courtesy of Michele Perras.

There are more photos in Michele’s photoset of the party.

Categories
Accordion, Instrument of the Gods It Happened to Me

Pictures of the Day

I attended Tom and Michele’s housewarming party on Saturday and took some pictures. Here are my favourites…

The “College Girl Dorm Room Poster” Shot

Tom did a little birthday dance number to entertain the crowd — first solo, then joined by Michele. It concluded with this smooch, which just cried out for the Robert Doisneau black-and-white treatment:

Tom Purves and Michele Perras in a post-dance smooch
Coming soon to an Imaginus poster sale near you!

Another Accordion Convert

I’m always happy to let a friend try on the accordion, and since Michele asked, I got these photos.

Michele Perras playing Joey deVilla
She hasn’t hit that moment of accordion transcendence yet…

Michele Perras playing Joey deVilla
…ah, there we go!

Categories
Uncategorized

“Mommy, Where Do Subprime Loan Meltdowns Come From?”

Here’s a photo that recent appeared in the blog Consumerist. I had to borrow the title as well; it was perfect and couldn’t be improved upon:

Table at Wal-Mart with sign: “Apply for a credit card and receive a free 2-liter bottle of Pepsi or Diet Pepsi”
Click the photo to see the original article.

According to Consumerist, the photo was taken on January 10th at a Wal-Mart in Albany, New York.

Categories
Uncategorized

“Bring It!”

I guess the moral of the story here is to choose your weapons carefully.

Animation: Threatening guy licks knife; not-so-threatening guy licks plunger
Animation courtesy of Miss Fipi Lele.

Categories
Uncategorized

“MP3-Ready” George Foreman Grill

In the Simpsons episode titled The Canine Mutiny, Bart uses his newly-acquired credit card to buy presents for his family. One of the presents he gives to Marge is a frying pan with a radio built into the handle.

The problem with being a satirist in this day and age is that reality often leapfrogs you. Case in point: this “MP3 Ready” George Foreman Grill, with integrated amplifier and speakers:

George Foreman MP3 grill

[This article was cross-posted to Global Nerdy.]

Categories
The Current Situation

Perhaps We Shouldn’t Have Welcomed Them as Liberators

Chinese troops marching in the snow

Over at the blog Cathartic Relief, there’s an interesting alternate-future-history story that takes place 8 years after the Chinese invaded America in the summer of 2008. I’m sure it’ll get readers riled up in all sorts of different ways; feel free to sound off in the comments!

Some excerpts:

It’s been eight years now. Eight long years. Sure, initially I was glad when China toppled the Bush regime and executed the “retarded tyrant” as I love to call him. It wasn’t that bad at the start, but as time wore on and I realized they weren’t leaving, it started to gnaw at me.

Tienanmen square tanks

The Chinese instituted some changes. They said that the only truly free society was one in which everyone worked for the common good. The imposed their political system on us without asking. I think they believe they’re doing us a favor.

Then there’s the checkpoints they introduced. There are sickeningly frequent reports of US citizens being killed at these checkpoints throughout the country. Apparently what happens is that a carload of civilians gets shouted at (in Chinese) to slow down or stop. Not understanding, they fail to comply. Result: bullet riddled civilians with confused and terrified looks on their faces. Just last week the Chinese killed a busload of 17 civilians. Most of them were school children on a class trip. There were three teachers too.

While the Chinese have deployed much of their national army on US soil, they’ve also used a lot of civilian contractors to enforce curfews and protect foreign diplomats. These contractors and the company they work for (Redwater) are beyond the reach of the US judicial system. The Chinese have given them immunity for their actions on US soil and the company spirits away any individuals accused of wrongdoing before an investigation can get underway, even if there was a point to conducting one.

Chinese Army in an assembly

Initially, people seemed to accept the fact that we needed help getting rid of Bush’s dictatorship. Lately, I think people have come to understand that the Chinese are really here for our natural resources. In the fusion driven, post-oil world, apparently American soil contains a lot of the minerals that drive the fusion process. I don’t really understand it but apparently the largest supply of “whatever it is” (some sort of helium?) was found in Iowa. The Chinese have set up camp there and apparently haven’t left. They can talk all they want about giving us our freedom but with 4,500,000 dead, 21,000,000 Americans who’ve fled and are now living as refugees elsewhere (12,000,000 in Canada alone) and another 1,100,000 fleeing each month, I gotta tell ya, it doesn’t feel all that free.

These are only excerpts; be sure to read the full story.