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Life moves faster than blogging…

…but the point is to live so that you can always say “I gotta blog this!

I’m looking at my backlog of unfinished blog entries. So far it consists of:

  • Worst Date Ever, part 5, or the actual “worst date” from which the story arc draws its name
  • Stories from Derek’s Stag, where I learn a valuable lesson about “getting digits”
  • The remainder of the blackout story
  • A night out with Fuzzy

…and I’m sure the wedding and Niagara Falls trip should provide ample storytelling fodder too.

Hopefully, as the freelance client work winds down, I’ll have more time to sit in cafes during the evenings with the trusty new Powerbook and write it all down. (Mind you, hanging out in cafes with a laptop is usually how all my girl trouble begins…)

Have a bloggably good weekend, everybody!

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Congrats, Derek and Allison!

Black Hugo Boss suit? Check.

Dress accordion? Check.

Camera? Check.

Gift? Check.

I’m off to Queenston, Ontario to see my friends Derek and Allison get married this afternoon at 5:00, and then party the whole night long with my friends from Crazy Go Nuts University. The ceremony’s in Queenston — where Allison’s family is from — but this is a rare opportunity to see this cute couple as they live in Switzerland now. It’s also a chance to see Dhimant, who lives in Philly and Sascha, who’s now in Ottawa.

Weddings, the theory goes, are good places to, ahem, hook up. Or at least they would be, if my friends getting married would show some common courtesy and invite single women to their weddings. I want to be able to affect a Spider-Man voice (a la the old cheesy animated series) and say “Bridesmaid…senses…tingling!

(A number of people have asked me recently if I’m one of those “committed bachelors”. Actually, the answer is no — it’s just that the one person I ever seriously broached the subject with said “no”. She will regret this decision years from now, when local news crews use her life story for puff pieces: “And now, here’s a story about the crazy old lady whose lives alone with 75 cats…”)

Anyway, on Sunday, we’ll probably explore the wonderfully cheesy Niagara Falls tourist traps. I need to work on my Skee-Ball game.

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"It’s the post-electrical age!", part 1

The headline of this entry comes from non other than Steve Mann, whom I had the pleasure of meeting, hearing and chatting with last night. In spite of the fact that accordion city was in the throes of a blackout that affected southeastern Canada and the northeastern U.S., the DECONISM gallery talk went on as scheduled, and even had lights thanks to the fact that cyborgs always have backup power.

Yesterday, 4:15 p.m.

It was your typical working day at Tucows. Boss Ross and I had come back from a meeting with a client an hour earlier, and I had just made a quick run to the kitchen for a tall glass of icewater and was ready to tuck into some XML-RPC programming in Python. It was mid-afternoon, my desk is under a skylight and my personal Powerbook is my primary work machine, so I didn’t notice that the power had cut out until I heard anguished cries coming from my coworkers.

“NOOOOOOOOOO!” yelled Bessy, who sat across the trench from me. She held her hands at her monitor, as if trying to choke it to death. “No, no, no, no, no! I haven’t saved yet!”

I looked about: everyone around me, save for the laptop users had blank monitors. I looked at the monitor of my company issued TPS Report-grade Dell desktop and saw that the power lights on the monitor and box were out, as were the overhead lights (which would’vebeen diluted by the incoming sun from the skylight).

“What, again?” remarked Josh, who sat a couple of seats away from me.

“This has happened before?” I asked.

“Yeah. Not too long ago. June, probably before you started here,” he said.

Sometimes this happens, especially in areas like Liberty Village, where Tucows is located: a former warehouse/industrial district retrofitted into workplaces for creatives and techies. The power can sometimes be flaky, but with the business and condos spring up around the area, these problems had pretty much vanished over the past five or so years.

I dimmed the screen on the Powerbook slightly to stretch out the battery life, just in case. I continued working, as I didn’t need a net connection for what I was doing.

Ross walked up to my desk. “Power’s out in Etobicoke,” he said. Etobicoke is a west-end burb of Toronto. He was on the phone with a manager at his bank, and she’d lost power too.

“No lights in Scarborough!” yelled someone else from another corner of the office. Scarborough is a burb on the extreme east end of Toronto. This outage was city-wide.

“I wonder if the traffic lights are out,” I said. “I’m going to take a look.”

I walked outside and hit King Street. At the corner of King and Dufferin, a streetcar sat frozen. The traffic lights were out, and the cars at the intersection were playing that “are you gonna move or am I?” game of wills.

Oh, shit, I thought.

I walked back to the office. In the parking lot, a number of my cowokers gathered around someone’s car. He’d opened his doors and tuned in to AM news radio and turned up the volume.

“…looks like fire coming from the Con Edison building…” said a reporter.

“What’s Con Edison?” asked someone.

“Electric company in New York,” I answered automatically.

“So why’s the power out here?

“Beats me,” I said. “But isn’t the grid shared? Can’t they borrow power from us and us from them, if it’s needed? Maybe their system blew, they tried to draw from us, drew too much, and ours blew.” At least that’s how it would work in a house. I have no idea how it works for large-scale power transmission systems.

“You know,” said one of the guys, pulling out a huge digital SLR camera, “I should go take pictures. there should be some interesting scenes tonight.”

“I’m sooooo blogging this!” I yelled, with my fists in the air. This got a laugh.

Going home

King Street is serviced by streetcar, and without electricity, people were forced to walk. This part of King Street never has pedestrian traffic the like of which we had yesterday afternoon; it was more like a shopping district on a Saturday. People were slowly milling in the afternoon heat, many on cell phones trying to find out what was going on. Car traffic was bumper-to-bumper, what with the non-functioning traffic lights and streetcars that had been transformed into obstacles.

I turned north onto Shaw, which took me to the western edge of Trinity Bellwoods Park and then turned east on to Queen Street, land of the hipsters. Queen was even more full of people, some of whom were walking home, while others were people who worked in the shops and were standing outside their businesses, wondering what to do next.

“‘Cordion man!” yelled a sous-chef I sort of knew from one of the restaurants. I pulled over to talk to him. “You should go an’ busk tonight. So many people on the street, you’ll make a shitload of money!”

“Exactly my thinking, Kamal. How ’bout you?”

“We got gas stoves and the walk-in fridge’ll keep the meat cold at least for tonight. So we’re open for business, far as I can tell. No fans in the kitchen, though,” he said, wiping his brow.

Biking farther east, I saw something I had to photograph. On the sidewalk outside the W hair boutique, an undaunted stylist was cutting his customer’s hair.

“It’s too dark inside, so I couldn’t see what I was doing,” he told me. He and his cutomer let me take pictures.

“The haircut must go on!” I said.

The major intersection closest to my house — Queen and Spadina — was packed with people and cars. A civic-minded volunteer rose to the occasion and started to direct traffic. Pedestrians gave him spare change for his hard work, some people brought him cans of pop and one person even gave him a yellow hard hat to look more official.

Robbie, who was working the 24-hour hot dog stand at Queen and Spadina, stood at his post, shaking his head. “Gonna be a fucking zoo tonight,” he said.

Next: Accordion Guy and Mister Cyborg to the rescue!

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Friday accordion video day #2 will be delayed…

…on account of the blackout that took place last night. I’ll probably record it this weekend and post it on Monday.

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So what are they doing, right here, right now?

The early 1990s had an amazing explosion of all kinds of music. Think about it:

  • Industrial and industrial-ish dance bands such as Ministry and Nine Inch Nails at the height of their popularity
  • Hip-hop was its most varied with acts like Public Enemy mixing it up with Anthrax to Me Phi Me and PM Dawn experimenting with a mellow tripped-out sound
  • The rise of techno, which would later give birth to electronica (and c’mon, tell me that in your most drunken state, didn’t you like dancing to 2 Unlimited’s Get Ready For This?
  • Bands like Nirvana/Pearl Jam/Soundgarden/Faith No More showing us what you could do if you stopped writing metal like crap
  • Sonic Youth/Loop/Mudhoney/Dinosaur Jr. exploring the possibilities of noise
  • …and Britpop

It was a great time to be a DJ, which I was, at the engineering pub at Crazy Go Nuts University. You went to the main campus pub for pitchers of watery beer, girlypop and jock rock; you went to my pub for Crown Royal and cool music.

Britpop in the early 90s, in this humble DJ’s opinion, could be split into two major categories:

  • Shoegazer bands — with guitarists and very earnest singers who sounded and look very sad. I blame British cuisine.
  • Manchester bands, who built danceable rock on top of a patter from the drum solo in james Brown’s Funky Drummer.

The Manchester bands could further be subdivided into synthy and non-synthy, each with their holy trinity. On the non-synthy side, you had the holy trinity of the Inspiral Carpets, the Charlatans and Blur while on the synthy side, you had the Soup Dragons, EMF, …

…and Jesus Jones.

So, after this long preamble, which was meant to take you down memory lane (or history lane, if you’re on the young side), I now get to the actual main point of this entry:

What are Jesus Jones up to now?

Thanks to Jen at Circadian Shift for the link!

Recommended Listening

A taste of Jesus Jones’ big hit, Right Here, Right Now, in either Windows Media or RealOne format.

A slice of the drum solo from James Brown’s Funky Drummer. The funky drummer who came up with the riff is one Clyde Stubblefield, to whom hip-hop, funk, rock and even industrial music owe a great debt.

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The next three days

For the next three days, my evening social calendar gets nutty! For two out of the three evenings, if you’re in the area of Accordion City and feel so inclined, you can join in!

Tonight: I’m very sure Plato’s Cave never has a hot tub in it. The somewhat a-little-too-in-love-with-the-whole-new-media-thing-in-that-1996-kind-of-way Derrick de Kerckhove will be moderate a hot tub panel discussion featuring wearable computing guru Steve Mann, French cyberspace philospher Pierre Levy and virtual reality artist Maurice Benayoun. The topic: How do personal cybernetic devices change the way we interact, and our perception of reality?

The web site for the venue, the DECONISM Gallery describes the event in true MONDO 2000 style:

The personal will turn political as the three intellectuals debate the nature of virtual fiction, whilst submerged in a translucent, networked, interactive and IMMERSIVE multimedia art installation. Displaying the private DECONversation as a public event will allow for an interactive reversal between the counterpublic and the counterprivate. The reversal will come into full effect as microphones and cameras will project the communal bath by means of simulation and simulacra, in the tradition of Plato’s Caves, into another spatial reality. Professor Steve Mann’s vision that: In the coming decades we will live in an age of shared realities and new levels of cultural discourse.

Well, that’s my recommended monthly allowance of postmodernism right there!

Boris is coming down to Accordion City from Montreal for this event, and I’ll probably arrange to meet with him at the nearby L’Idiot du Village Pub at the corner of McCaul and Dundas streets before the big do. They’ll have WiFi there, so he and I will bring our laptops. Boris will be the conduit for Joi Ito, who will be attending via telepresence via Boris’ webcam. I’ll blog the event, make smart-ass remarks on the #joiito IRC channel and take pictures.

Drinking may ensue after the event.

Oh, who am I kidding. Drinking will ensue after the event.

The fun takes place at 8:00 p.m. at the DECONISM Gallery, 330 Dundas St. West, across the street from the Art Gallery of Ontario. Tickets are $10 and will be available at the door.

If you want to join us, drop me a line or call my cell: (416) WIT-N-HIP. I’m serious, that’s what my phone number spells on the keypad.

Tomorrow night: I’m making it up as I go along. A man by the name of Fuzzy Gerdes and his friend Shaun Himmerick will be in town tomorrow night for the Toronto International Improv Festival. Together, they are the long-form improv act called Bare, and I will be providing incidental accordion music for their show.

Here’s a quick description of Bare:

Bare is two men who perform with the energy and presence of a 10-person group — a group with some acrobats, a fire-eater, and a rock band in there somewhere. Their show starts with a single audience suggestion, and from that tiny seed they grow an improvisational tornado of extraordinary characters, extraordinary situations, and usually one impersonation of a live animal.

Bare will hit the stage at 8:00 p.m. on Friday at the Poor Alex Theatre, which is at 296 Brunswick Avenue. Admission is $20.

After the show, drinking will ensue.

Saturday night: Are any of you bridesmaids single? I’ll be attending my friend Derek Walker’s wedding in lovely Queenston, Ontario. I’ll be bringing the dress accordion to this one.

Drinking will most definitely ensue.

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Teething pains

The look and feel of the blog — as well as some features — are going to be erratic for the next little while. Those are the risks when one is a test pilot, but what better way to give Blogware a thorough shake-down than with a reasonably popular blog?

Some notes:

1. Yeah, I know the timestamps attached to my posts are off. Not much I can do about that. I’m not on the development team, so all I can do is go to the “Settings” page and see that I’ve already selected my time zone. I’ll file a bug report.

2. Requiring an account just so you can tag your comments with your name and URL sucks. I agree with the many people who’ve sent me email and instant messages about this one, and I’m going to fight like a pit bull for that feature.

3. Where are the accordion graphics? I just haven’t had time to make new ones that fit with the site’s cleaner look.

4. Archives. For the time being, archives that predate July 2003 can still be found in my old Blogger-based blog at http://kode-fu.com/shame/. I will be working on an open source tool to move my old Blogger entries to Blogware and make it available to anyone who wants it (that is, once it’s working and once Blogware’s out of beta). I’ll even blog the process and my design notes, seeing as I’ll probably do it in Python and not touchy-feely “let’s hear our inner voice” you-can-tell-what-I-had-for-lunch Perl.

5. Those slice-of-life stories, including the actual worst date of the Worst Date Ever series. Between the new job, wrapping up my freelance clients, housemate hunting, an upcoming wedding and so on, I’ve been trying to squeeze out enough time to finish the story. the wait will be worth it.