I’d just like to thank everyone for their kind words and condolences in response to my entry about my grandfather’s passing away. You guys are the best.
Categories
Categories
R.I.P. Granddad
On Sunday around 8:00 a.m. Manila time, Dr. Saturnino Ador Dionisio I,
my mother’s father and my last remaining grandparent, passed away.
I admired him for his cleverness and his tech-savvy, a trait that runs
strong in the Ador Dionisio family. During the brutal Japanese
occupation of the Philippines during World War II, the Japanese army
were in the habit of confiscating Filipinos’ automobiles for their own
use. Granddad took his car apart and hid its component pieces all over
his property. When the war was over, he reassembled it and was one of
the few civilians with a car in 1945.
His
request was to be cremated and to have his ashes flown to Toronto,
where they will be laid to rest beside my grandmother’s.
R.I.P. Granddad.
In reponse to the recent entry, A slice of last night as a play in one act, both Liz and Graig have written responses in their blogs. Go check ’em out.
For more on the topic, check out:
- Kim du Toit published this on my birthday last year: The Pussification of the Western Male. I responded by asserting my dude-itude and threw a party in a hot tub in an army truck.
- Heartless Bitches’ essays on “nice guys”, and why they’re finishing last.
Your comments, as always, are welcome.
Categories
All My Sins Remembered
At long last, all the entries of The Adventures of Accordion Guy in the 21st Century are finally in one place!
For the longest time, entries before July 2003 could only be found in my original Blogger-based blog, located at http://kode-fu.com/shame, while anything from that point on was located here at http://accordionguy.blogware.com.
That changed a couple of hours ago after I imported all those old
entries into this blog. This blog now has every entry I’ve ever made —
over 2200 in total — from November 11, 2001 to the present day.
For those of you not familiar with the old blog, here are links to what I consider are some of my best entries:
The New Girl Story
This is the blog entry that got me nominated for a bloggie and landed me a chapter in the book Never Threaten to Eat Your Co-Workers: Best of Blogs.
The short version: I gush about my new girlfriend in a blog entry,
someone reads that entry and sends me an email warning me that the
girlfriend is not whom she says she is. Creepiness ensues.
Adventures in Banking
You wouldn’t believe the bureaucratic gymnastics I had to go through
back when my housemate gave me rent cheques drawn from an American bank.
The Star Spangled Banner and Anal Sovereignty
The accordion saves my ass from US Customs…literally.
That Syd, what a mensch!
He’s been our family’s accountant for over twenty years because he’s
not afraid to get into shouting matching with Revenue Canada or suggest
roughing up my deadbeat housemate.
The World Youth Day Piece
I take the “unpopular” side in the debate over World Youth Day.
The accidental go-go dancer
The last thing I expected was to end up being hired as a go-go dancer
for a downtown club. That accordion gets me into some odd situations, I
tell you.
Not-So-Smart Mobs
Conversations and observations from the 2002 Reclaim the Streets party in Toronto. Their hearts are in the right place, but their heads might need a little work.
Breach of Security
Once upon a time, a guy posing as a new neighbour in distress conned me and
my housemate out of 80 bucks. Three months later, in what is either supreme
testicular fortitude or forgetfulness, he visits my house again and manages
to con my housemates out of 80 bucks and a lift.
The Best Christmas Present Ever
Christmas meets crablice (no, not mine!). A heart- and crotch-warming
story of the true meaning of Christmas that’s not likely to be turned
into a television special anytime soon.
Last Night
In a single night, I face romantic disappointment, thwart a pickpocket,
endure bad poetry, entertain a crowd, aid and abet underage drinking,
come between a small-town girl and two Gap ninjas, entertain another
crowd and get complimented on my hat.
Konichiwa, 2002!
In which I recount what happened to me on fourteen New Year’s Eves, in reverse order, from 2002 to 1988.
Now it can be told
I went on the date, brought the accordion, got a job.
Worst Date Ever
She was a pretty blonde waitress with an English accent who worked at
the cafe I frequented. I had a crush on her from the first moment I
laid eyes on her, and it turns out that she had a thing for me, too.
Unfortunately, that’s one of the few things that went right during the
relationship. This funny story contains scenes with adult situations,
violence, strong language and ABBA.
Robertson J. Strickler is the new housemate at my abode, Big Trouble in
Little China. He will enjoy the amenities that our fine bachelor pad
has to offer, but he needs to be mindful that he doesn’t waste his life
glued to the digital cable or our megabits of bandwidth. I defer to
“Hugo” from the webcomic Scary Go Round:
Yesterday, I linked to a post I’d written for the Blogware blog, in
which I said that once you have an export file, it takes six clicks to
import your Movable Type/TypePad blog into Blogware. Just for kicks, I
made a
video of the six-click process. [900 KB QuickTime]
The scene: A table at a ROOFTOP PATIO. The air is abuzz with mildly
inebriated conversation and the intoxicating scent of spring air,
budding flora and cute women. Seated at the table are the ACCORDION
GUY, MELLOW VELO, VIDEO CHICK. They are talking to an ENTHUSIASTIC
YOUNG LADY who has come over from another table to converse.
One of the ENTHUSIASTIC YOUNG LADY’s friends comes over to the table
and tells her its time for them to loeave. The ENTHUSIASTIC YOUNG LADY
takes her leave of the table. The ACCORDION GUY waits a beat before
talking.
ACCORDION GUY: She’s cute and seems both clever and fun. You should’ve asked for her phone number. If I were a free man and a shade younger…
MELLOW VELO: Ehhhh…I dunno.
ACCORDION GUY: Dude, have you
been falling behind on your testoterone payments lately? Girl! Possibly
available! You! Available for too long! Go! There’s still time to catch up! Go!
MELLOW VELO gets up, makes a half-hearted five steps toward the door, stops, turns around and returns to his seat.
MELLOW VELO: Naaaaah.
ACCORDION GUY: Why’d you stop?
MELLOW VELO: If she was really interested, she’d have given me her phone number.
ACCORDION GUY (slaps hand on forehead): Oh, dear God, you are so stunningly wrong. I’m calling in experts. Hey, Video Chick, I need a woman’s opinion here in aisle seven…
VIDEO CHICK: Sure. What about?
ACCORDION GUY: I know that’s
its the 21st century and all that, but…let’s suppose you meet a guy
and you like him. Would you prefer that he make the first move and give
you his phone number, or would you rather do it?
VIDEO CHICK: I prefer it when
the guy does it. But that never happens anymore; I have to make the
first move. You know why? Because boys are pussies these days. Pussies!
ACCORDION GUY (making pelvic
thrust motions under the table, arms lifted above head): Ask The
Redhead. Not all boys. (Turns to MELLOW VELO) Dude, as soon as you
found out she was outdoorsy and an enginner, you were looking at her
the way Marlon Brando looks at pork chops!
VIDEO CHICK: Boys suck.
MELLOW VELO: Yeah, but I didn’t get an interested vibe from her.
ACCORDION GUY: Even when the
odds seem bad, I always step up to bat. Or at least I did, when I was
available. Which I’m not anymore, because I stepped up to the plate every time. This is just like the time that girl was checking me out and you told the entire table except for me.
MELLOW VELO: If something was going to happen, something would have happened.
ACCORDION GUY (clasping both sides of his head): You don’t know that, and I can’t act on information I don’t know! When did you get into predestination, anyway?
MELLOW VELO: I’ve seen you play
the odds, and you always worked the interested girls harder. There are
the ones who don’t pay any attention, and then there are the ones
pawing the accordion, and then you. Remember what’s-her-face from Lee’s
Palace?
ACCORDION GUY (wistfully): [Sigh]
Yeah. (snaps to) But — uh — as I was going to say, you have to
actually step forward and make some kind of move before you can even
hope to determine who’s interested and who’s not. Do you agree, Video
Chick?
VIDEO CHICK: Boys. Are. Pussies.