“Unfinished Business” Week, Part 5
Updated “About” Page
The first of many updates to this site. I’ve added a photo gallery sidebar to the “about” page so you can see what a naked man playing accordion looks like.
Go ahead. Click the link. You know you want to…
Shout-outs
Here are some things that I’ve been meaning to say to various people in my life. I will, for the sake of their privacy, not say which thing is for which person. You (and they) will have to figure out that part.
- Bitch, where’s my money?
- It was good seeing you again. It’s been too long.
- Wear looser underwear, man. You’ll feel better.
- Have you ever been serenaded before? Would you like to be?
- You fucked up again. Three strikes – you’re out. And judging by what you’re up to, the remainder of your life will be a series of fuck-ups. Stay the hell away from me.
- Looking forward to the big event, and thanks for mentioning me!
- Your greatest contribution to the world is providing plants with valuable carbon dioxide.
- You don’t know what you’re missing…
- That stuff will eventually melt your brain.
- Stop being such a doormat!
- I believe in you. Why don’t you?
- I know you fear it, but it’s coming for you. And I’m going to watch and laugh.
- You’re a backstabbing weasel, and I’ve seen your stuff. It’s crap.
- I should’ve lured you away from your loser boyfriend.
- No matter what happened, we’ve always persevered, haven’t we? Oh yeah: fuck the new ending.
- Thanks for all the great opportunities. Here’s to your newest one!
- I’ll call soon.
- And you thought I’d never amount to anything. Drop dead, bitch.
- Wait. Just wait. And watch.
- You’re going to grow up to be a fine young man if I have anything to do with it.
- Undressing in front of me was just plain cruel.
- She had more fun with me.
- Yeah, I think I look better with blond hair than purple, too.
- Glad to see you’re back on the meds.
- I know, I should’ve said something.
- How ’bout I go interrupt your work and slap the dick out of your mouth?
- Did I happen to mention that I can cook, too?
- Thank you. For everything.