Pirates, Ninjas, Elves and Dwarves

[ via Boing Boing

] Tom “Plasticbag.org” Coates has come up with another two-axis

classification scheme for working types: the Pirate/Ninja axis, and the

Elf/Dwarf axis. The meat of his essay:

I have always considered the profound distinction between ninjas and

pirates to be an absolute one. One was either ninja or pirate – there

were no inbetweens. One personality type was skilled and proficient,

elegant and silent, contained and constrained, honourable and

spiritual. The other type loud and flamboyant, gregarious and

unrestrained, life-loving and vigorous, passionate and strong. I

thought all people must pledge their allegiance, or be categorised accordingly.

The other day at work, another binary pair was presented to me – a

co-worker who doesn’t declare people pirate or ninja, but instead elf

or dwarf. For him, humanity falls into doers and thinkers – elves being

elegant and timeless, conceptual and refined, abstract and beautiful

while dwarves are practical and structural, hard-working and

no-nonsense, down-to-earth smiths and makers. It’s a view of the world

that’s expounded a bit in Cryptonomicon.

Coates drew the two axes and plotted a number of big bloggers on them, resulting in this chart:

I wonder where I’d fall. Probably much closer to pirate, maybe straddling elf and dwarf. What do you think?

My mother’s family traces its ancestry back to Chinese pirate Limahong, so I guess I should declare my allegiance to the pirates. Besides, I think that hot tub parties are more a pirate thing than a ninja thing.

Very interesting reading. Perhaps I should contact Coates and offer to program the “where are you on this chart?” quiz.

Go read the article, and while you’re at it, read Scott “PvP” Kurtz’ “Pirate vs. Ninja” series of comic strips.