Actually, hobbits are better dressers

From Shrine of the Holy Whapping comes this report of a fashion crime in progress:

 

To quote actor Rainer Wolfcastle playing Radioactive Man from The Simpsons: “Aaaagh! My eyes! The goggles do nothing!”

The news report says:

Italian fashion label Etro unveiled its own little and large show in Milan yesterday as two hirsute models hit the catwalk to show off its latest collection.

Sporting checked suits, the models looked more like they had stepped off the set of a Lord of the Rings film than the glamour fashion houses of Milan.

Not quite right — the hair, sideburns and beard are straight out of the Shire, but the jackets and ugly 1970’s-ish clashing plaids are all wrong. The look isn’t from the hobbits from Lord of the Rings; it’s more from Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd, the creepy-geek assassins from Diamonds are Forever:

  

Take a look at the hobbits chilling out in Rivendell:

The vest-and-regular/banded collar shirt-look is a traditional yet snappy look that I’ve been trying to cultivate lately. I think the hobbits are pretty sharp dressers for the most part (at least when they’re not slogging through forests or swamps). If you were to lengthen their the-Shire-experiences-lots-of-flooding capri pants and give them some footwear, they wouldn’t look out of place in many offices, cafes, lounges, bars or even giving an Apple Computer keynote presentation, like the similarly-dressed gentleman pictured below:

And hey, Steve Jobs’ beard is worthy of a rider of Rohan.