Meanwhile, in Greece…

by Joey deVilla on July 7, 2015

new greek finance minister

Thanks to Alex Downie and Jill Nurse for the find!

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f-16 fighter motorcycle

The photo from the Craigslist article. Click it to see the source.

If you’ve got $25,000 burning a hole in your pocket — maybe less if you negotiate — you might want to head up to Spring Hill to get this one-of-a-kind motorbike. It’s featured in a Tampa Bay Craigslist ad, which has this text (and yup, the all caps is theirs):

THIS ONE OF A KIND REPLICA F-16 FIGHTER MOTORCYCLE HAS A 650 SUZUKI BURGMAN MOTOR. RUNS EXCELLENT
VERY UNIQUE
CALL, NO TEXT, THIS IS A LAND LINE

Want this ride? Go visit the Craigslist ad and give its owner a call!

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Update

lean machine

Shane Parsons pointed out that the fighter bike is reminiscent of the “Lean Machine”, an early eighties GM concept vehicle.

Thanks to Mondo Lulu for the find!

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Today’s forecast

by Joey deVilla on July 6, 2015

936 F

Click the photo to see it at full size.

Those numbers are in Herr Fahrenheit’s antiquated system, but even so, that 5 p.m. temperature forecast’s a little high.

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it seemed like a good idea at the time

He’s no fruit ninja

As a YouTube watcher, you can already sense the impending FAIL, but as far as “Ali” was concerned, there were no possible bad outcomes when he placed a watermelon on a glass patio table and attempted to cleave it in twain with a scimitar:

To add insult to patio table injury, the watermelon came out of the experience intact.

There ain’t nose party like a sausage party

Ali’s loss is minor compared to Ethan Schneider’s. He and a buddy were trying to impress friends at a party with a trick where he’d hold a kielbasa in his mouth while his buddy sliced it with a katana. You already know where this is going…

Here’s what TMZ reports about the aftermath:

repaired nose

4 hours of surgery and a slew of stitches later, Ethan got his sniffer back. He can smell but has no feeling  … and doctors aren’t sure if it will ever come back.

That’s called a good result.

If you’re the morbidly curious type, feel free to mosey on down to TMZ’s story, where you can see the pre-surgery pictures (after clicking on a “Warning! Graphic photos!” link first). You might not want to do this if you’re eating or easily nauseated.

Recommended viewing

Back in 2013, YouTube video personality Ryan Higa tried a real-life version of Fruit Ninja, but apparently forgot that unlike the game, everything in the real world comes with mass and Newton’s Third Law built-in:

A key difference between Ryan Higa’s video and the first two in this article is that Higa shot his video properly. The others fell victim to Vertical Video Syndrome, a common problem with videos shot using phones:

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I’m surprised this isn’t abused more often

by Joey deVilla on July 5, 2015

amc self serve butter flavor

Photo taken last night by Yours Truly. I finally got to see Mad Max: Fury Road.

Giving away free butter — or even free imitation butter — anywhere in the Sun Belt seems like a bad, bad idea. Down here, that’s just an invitation to “weez the juice”, Pauly Shore-style.

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safe and happy 4th

It the 4th of July — Independence Day — and here in these United States of ‘Murica, that means fireworks. And the annual intentionally disturbing, unintentionally funny safety video from the CPSC, short for the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission.

fireworks safety video

The folks at Gizmodo have taken the most visually arresting bits from the CPSC video and turned it into 1-minute, 29-second “highlight reel”, complete with an added Muzak soundtrack:

I can imagine the planning meeting for the video:

CPSC official 1: We need to demonstrate how a bottle rocket can take someone’s eye out in a way that’s presentable to the public, yet gruesome at the same time, and doable with homemade special effects.

CPSC official 2: How about we use some twine or fishing line to guide the bottle rocket to a mannequin’s eye?

CPSC official 1: That’s a good start, but I need more gore. Tasteful gore.

CPSC official 3: I’ve got it! We scoop out one of the mannequin’s eyes…

CPSC official 1 (sitting forward in chair): I’m listening…

CPSC official 3: …and we put a raw egg in the resulting eye-socket!

CPSC official 1: GENIUS! Make it happen! Now remember that we’ve only got an afternoon to do it, and our budget is twnety bucks.

If you’d much rather watch the official video, complete with English and Spanish soundbites from official-looking people and “B-roll” for news organizations who need some additional video shots, here it is:

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Today’s a slow business day in the USA

by Joey deVilla on July 3, 2015

independence day of the dead

Things are dead slow today.
Click the photo to see it at full size.

The national holiday — Independence Day, the 4th of July — takes place on a Saturday this year, so a good number of businesses are treating today — Friday, July 3rd, the closest weekday — as a day off. If you’re trying to contact a business from outside the US and wondering why nobody’s replying to your calls or messages today, you now know the reason why.

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