July 2018

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Here’s a business opportunity for an enterprising Florida writer: this book is from 1975, and with people moving here in record numbers, it’s long-overdue for an update.

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Yet another reminder to double-check your work

by Joey deVilla on July 24, 2018

Look closely at that compass image in the sign’s background. The class of 2018 is in for a bigger adventure than they think!

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T-shirt of the day

by Joey deVilla on July 24, 2018

Better still, I’ve got all the bases on that T-shirt covered!

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The list of known celebrity D&D players keeps growing! It’s got Ta-Nehesi Coates, Sasha Grey, Vin Diesel, Anderson Cooper, and now Deborah Ann Woll, who plays Karen Page in the Marvel TV series Daredevil, The Defenders, and The Punisher.

How into D&D is she? You can find out in this interview with D&D Beyond:

If you’d like to see her Dungeon Master style, you can — here’s her running a session on Stream of Many Eyes:

I’d love to see her take on the role on Dungeon Master in this little skit, with Vin Diesel playing the “Where’s the Cheetos?” guy:

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Make America Brannigan!

by Joey deVilla on July 23, 2018

Zapp Brannigan naked in bed, with Trump quote: "If Ivanka weren't my daughter, I'd probably be dating her."

Donald Trump quotes work really well if you imagine Futurama’s Zapp Brannigan saying them.

Zapp Brannigan standing proudly with Trump quote: "My IQ is one of the highest — and you all know it! Please don't feel so stupid or insecure; it's not your fault.""

Zapp Brannigan standing and pointing upward with Trump quote: "My fingers are long and beautiful, as, it has been well been documented, are various other parts of my body."

Angry Zapp brannigan with Trump quote: "My Twitter has become so powerful that I can actually make my enemies tell the truth."

Zapp brannigan with Trump quote: "I have a great relationship with the blacks!"

Angry Zapp Brannigan with trump quote: "Well, someone's doing the raping! I mean, someone's doing it! Who's doing the raping?!""

Sassy Zapp Brannigan: "There's nobody bigger or better at the military than I am."

Crying Zapp Brannigan: "I was down there and I watched our police and our firemen down at 7-Eleven! Down at the World Trade Center!"

Zapp Brannigan smoking a cigarette with Trump quote: "The concept of global warming was created by the Chinese."

Found via Jojo Georgiou.

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The clearance shelf at my local Publix is always a source of amusement. I’ve seen time-warped hair care products, the funniest adult diaper packaging, and products that I didn’t even know existed.

But tea tree oil vaginal suppositories is on a whole new, painful level. If you’ve ever had tea tree oil applied to a cut, you know that it stings like nothing else. It’s probably much worse when applied to the nether regions.

Later, I ran a search on the phrase tea tree oil vagina and discovered two things:

  1. I’m going to see some really weird-ass advertisements in my browser for the next couple of weeks, and
  2. “tea tree oil vagina” lives in what’s known as a keyword void.

A keyword void is defined as “a situation where searching for answers about a keyword returns an absence of authoritative, reliable results, in favor of ‘content produced by a niche group with a particular agenda.’”

One example of a particularly harmful keyword void is featured in a recent Wired article titled The complexity of simply searching for medical advice. The example concerns vitamin K, which is typically injected into newborns in the first few hours of their lives. Infants are born without enough vitamin K in their systems, and the vitamin prevents any potential bleeding. The problem is that if you Google for why vitamin K is administered to newborns, there aren’t enough factual articles, and this is a void that the anti-vaccine crowd has capitalized on.

Here’s the key excerpt:

There’s an asymmetry of passion at work. Which is to say, there’s very little counter-content to surface because it simply doesn’t occur to regular people (or, in this case, actual medical experts) that there’s a need to produce counter-content. Instead, engaging blogs by real moms with adorable children living authentic natural lives rise to the top, stating that doctors are bought by pharma, or simply misinformed, and that the shot is risky and unnecessary. The persuasive writing sounds reasonable, worthy of a second look. And since so much of the information on the first few pages of search results repeats these claims, the message looks like it represents a widely-held point of view. But it doesn’t. It’s wrong, it’s dangerous, and it’s potentially deadly.

“Tea tree oil vagina” exists in a keyword void. When I search for that term — and remember, everyone’s search results are different — the first page of results gives me an even split:

  • 5 web pages that suggest that tea tree oil is a great way to reduce vaginal odor and eliminate yeast infections,
  • a web page that says that studies of the use of tea tree oil to treat vaginal infections have been inconclusive,
  • 4 web pages citing actual doctors telling you that for the love of everything good and holy, please don’t put tea tree oil in your vagina, and
  • 3 links to videos (all of which are douchey in every sense of the word) that show you how to use tea tree oil to treat yeast infection and get rid of vaginal odor.

Simply put: don’t use those tea tree oil vaginal suppositories. They lead to nothing good.

I leave you with a link to this Bustle article featuring advice from Dr. Melissa Holmes, an OB/GYN and founder of Girlology.com: 9 Things You Should Never Put In Or On Your Vagina.

 

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Click the map to see it at full size.

Also:

  • What’s with all the suffocation in Idaho, Wyoming, Nevada, Utah, Colorado, and New Mexico?
  • If you tell someone from Indiana that their number one injury diagnosis is “struck by object”, they usually say “Oh yeah, that makes a lot of sense”.
  • Maybe Louisiana’s state motto should be “Not the face!!!”

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