Comments on: Travel Advisory for People Flying to the British Isles http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/ Joey deVilla's Personal Blog Thu, 28 Aug 2008 23:38:45 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.1 By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8124 Anonymous Thu, 07 Sep 2006 09:36:29 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8124 Dehydration on flights already adds to cattle-class misery. Now that we are no longer allowed to bring water bottles, not only have the terrorists scored, but so have the airlines who will not hesitate to price-gauge us poor cattle for .5 litres of water. Let's start the bidding at 5 quid: Anyone?? Dehydration on flights already adds to cattle-class misery. Now that we are no longer allowed to bring water bottles, not only have the terrorists scored, but so have the airlines who will not hesitate to price-gauge us poor cattle for .5 litres of water. Let’s start the bidding at 5 quid: Anyone??

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8123 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 17:14:23 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8123 Well, National Express bus service did the security job for BA. My bus trip from Plymouth was running a half hour late, but the driver still did his rest stop thing at a shopping centre (one that is in cahoots with the bus company I'm sure). The duration of the rest stop? Why, exactly a half hour. That meant my whole group missed the check-in deadline by 20 minutes (but way more than an hour before departure time)! Next flight, 24 hours away! Well, National Express bus service did the security job for BA. My bus trip from Plymouth was running a half hour late, but the driver still did his rest stop thing at a shopping centre (one that is in cahoots with the bus company I’m sure). The duration of the rest stop? Why, exactly a half hour. That meant my whole group missed the check-in deadline by 20 minutes (but way more than an hour before departure time)! Next flight, 24 hours away!

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8118 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 11:50:29 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8118 The fact that you think those are your only options shows that the terrorists have already won. The fact that you think those are your only options shows that the terrorists have already won.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8122 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 11:26:46 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8122 OK.....so you werent allowed pens on the plane. But then they actually handed one around all 172 of you row to row. What the f**k? If a pen REALLY is a dangerous weapon then why'd they give one out??? This kind of action by our so called security services just shows how retarded they are. I'm sure any creative terrorist with half a brain could get round the measures of these idiots. OK…..so you werent allowed pens on the plane. But then they actually handed one around all 172 of you row to row. What the f**k?

If a pen REALLY is a dangerous weapon then why’d they give one out??? This kind of action by our so called security services just shows how retarded they are. I’m sure any creative terrorist with half a brain could get round the measures of these idiots.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8103 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 08:45:48 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8103 I find stewed green lentils, with plenty of garlic and spices, and washed down with a few pints of gassy lager, serves this purpose very well... I find stewed green lentils, with plenty of garlic and spices, and washed down with a few pints of gassy lager, serves this purpose very well…

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8102 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 06:52:39 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8102 What about what's inside our bodies? Are we allowed to keep those liquids? Like stomach acid... now that sounds explosive. Or maybe we drank the liquid explosives, allowing them to mix together in our insides. This carefully measured concoction consists of just the right proportions of each liquid so that the mixture will only become explosive at precisely T+3.5 hours, which is exactly the amount of time it takes for me to get from my house to the airport, past security, and onto the plane. And that's even calculating the 15 minute mandatory stop at McDonald's because adding consumption of a Big Mac meal just makes the concoction all the more explosive. Aaaah, but how does it light you ask? Weellll, for that dears we simply swallow a zippo with an open top exposing its wheel-like ignition mechansim. Tied to it is a string stuck at the back of my throat. Regurgitate the string, yank it, and off we go! What about what’s inside our bodies? Are we allowed to keep those liquids? Like stomach acid… now that sounds explosive. Or maybe we drank the liquid explosives, allowing them to mix together in our insides. This carefully measured concoction consists of just the right proportions of each liquid so that the mixture will only become explosive at precisely T+3.5 hours, which is exactly the amount of time it takes for me to get from my house to the airport, past security, and onto the plane. And that’s even calculating the 15 minute mandatory stop at McDonald’s because adding consumption of a Big Mac meal just makes the concoction all the more explosive.

Aaaah, but how does it light you ask? Weellll, for that dears we simply swallow a zippo with an open top exposing its wheel-like ignition mechansim. Tied to it is a string stuck at the back of my throat. Regurgitate the string, yank it, and off we go!

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8101 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 05:14:41 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8101 Destroying the economy? What do you think people do when they reach their destination and they have no pens, perfume, shampoo and so forth? I think it's a cleaver scam. Meanwhile, I want a job as a security officer. If nothing else it means free toiletries for life! Destroying the economy? What do you think people do when they reach their destination and they have no pens, perfume, shampoo and so forth? I think it’s a cleaver scam.

Meanwhile, I want a job as a security officer. If nothing else it means free toiletries for life!

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8121 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 03:52:38 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8121 Bear in mind that security in Belfast's airports has always been stricter than the rest of the UK, for obvious reasons. Getting frisked a few times and your luggage repeatedly x-rayed is the norm. Even back in February -- when I finally left the place -- my stuff was x-rayed twice, I was frisked at least once and I had to completely empty out my hand luggage. It doesn't really seem that excessive after all the heightened security checks during the Troubles. At one point, simply going into town to shop involved almost as much hassle. Bear in mind that security in Belfast’s airports has always been stricter than the rest of the UK, for obvious reasons. Getting frisked a few times and your luggage repeatedly x-rayed is the norm.

Even back in February — when I finally left the place — my stuff was x-rayed twice, I was frisked at least once and I had to completely empty out my hand luggage.

It doesn’t really seem that excessive after all the heightened security checks during the Troubles. At one point, simply going into town to shop involved almost as much hassle.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8120 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 03:41:02 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8120 The pen is mightier than the sword. The pen is mightier than the sword.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8119 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 03:00:01 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8119 What? They let the chief flight attendant have a pen? That is an outrage! What? They let the chief flight attendant have a pen?
That is an outrage!

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8117 Anonymous Thu, 31 Aug 2006 00:01:18 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8117 If its a matter of choosing between being blown up mid-flight or losing a pen, i'll lose the pen. wait, if its a montblanc, i'll have to get back to you on that. If its a matter of choosing between being

blown up mid-flight or losing a pen, i’ll

lose the pen. wait, if its a montblanc,

i’ll have to get back to you on that.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8116 Anonymous Wed, 30 Aug 2006 23:55:21 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8116 I think this is only for flights to the US. I am flying Melbourne-Heathrow tonight, and there are no restrictions on hand luggage for my flight. Flights to the US, however, have <a href="http://www.melair.com.au/passenger_info/latest_passenger_info_item.asp?id=357" rel="nofollow">a ridiculous list of don'ts, can'ts and may nots</a>: I think this is only for flights to the US. I am flying Melbourne-Heathrow tonight, and there are no restrictions on hand luggage for my flight. Flights to the US, however, have a ridiculous list of don’ts, can’ts and may nots:

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8115 Anonymous Wed, 30 Aug 2006 23:37:59 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8115 You will, in the future, need to shit and piss prior to boarding the plane. You must be NPO prior to boarding, just as if this was a surgery. You mustn't have any liquids or semisolids in your abdominal cavity. Blood is acceptable as a fluid, provided you have less than 5 liters. Individuals who can be verified to exceed the 5 liter limit will need to present a note from their physician stating this fact, and will, at the gate, need to have their blood screened for bomb-making chemicals. Tears and mucus are permitted, provided they are clear in color, free from offending odors, and present in quantities smaller than 15 mL. Please allow for additional time at the screening gate while staff administers foley catheters to all passengers to verify the state of bladder emptiness You will, in the future, need to shit and piss prior to boarding the plane. You must be NPO prior to boarding, just as if this was a surgery. You mustn’t have any liquids or semisolids in your abdominal cavity. Blood is acceptable as a fluid, provided you have less than 5 liters. Individuals who can be verified to exceed the 5 liter limit will need to present a note from their physician stating this fact, and will, at the gate, need to have their blood screened for bomb-making chemicals.

Tears and mucus are permitted, provided they are clear in color, free from offending odors, and present in quantities smaller than 15 mL.

Please allow for additional time at the screening gate while staff administers foley catheters to all passengers to verify the state of bladder emptiness

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8114 Anonymous Wed, 30 Aug 2006 22:47:03 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8114 My mouth contain spit, a liquid. Its a US restriction unfortunately. My mouth contain spit, a liquid. Its a US restriction unfortunately.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8113 Anonymous Wed, 30 Aug 2006 22:29:15 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8113 Pens contain ink, a liquid. Its a US restriction unfortunately. Pens contain ink, a liquid. Its a US restriction unfortunately.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8100 Anonymous Wed, 30 Aug 2006 19:56:59 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8100 I agree with anonymous. It's destroying our economy. Forget about bringing play downs, this is how they are winning. I agree with anonymous. It’s destroying our economy. Forget about bringing play downs, this is how they are winning.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8112 Anonymous Wed, 30 Aug 2006 19:45:35 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8112 Nah, not us policy, our only change is no liquids, pens are fine. It was inept security folks or some that ralyl wanted a bag of 200$ executive pens for ebay. Nah, not us policy, our only change is no liquids, pens are fine. It was inept security folks or some that ralyl wanted a bag of 200$ executive pens for ebay.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8111 Anonymous Wed, 30 Aug 2006 18:55:26 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8111 AFAIK these strictures are for flights to US only. Last week I was flying out of Heathrow (to Poland) and pens were no problem. Also, there was no second security check and at the gate. So this is probably on request by US authorities. AFAIK these strictures are for flights to US only.

Last week I was flying out of Heathrow (to Poland) and pens were no problem. Also, there was no second security check and at the gate.

So this is probably on request by US authorities.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8110 Anonymous Wed, 30 Aug 2006 18:03:18 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8110 Just got back to the US after leaving Gatwick. No problem with pens there, and was told specifically that they were okay by staff. We were called to board by gender/zone as well, though not all of us were hand searched. In fact, in spte of the fact that I'm a male in my late 20's and have a ponytail, I was passed through and the 70 + year old man in front of me was searched instead. Ah, the ways of paranoid security measures are nebulous indeed. US to UK measures are much more stringent and ridiculous, but UK to US seems [relatively] reasonable. Definitely though, these security measures are adding time onto the boarding process, so people should plan to show up at least an hour early. Just got back to the US after leaving Gatwick. No problem with pens there, and was told specifically that they were okay by staff. We were called to board by gender/zone as well, though not all of us were hand searched. In fact, in spte of the fact that I’m a male in my late 20’s and have a ponytail, I was passed through and the 70 + year old man in front of me was searched instead. Ah, the ways of paranoid security measures are nebulous indeed. US to UK measures are much more stringent and ridiculous, but UK to US seems [relatively] reasonable. Definitely though, these security measures are adding time onto the boarding process, so people should plan to show up at least an hour early.

]]> By: Anonymous http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8109 Anonymous Wed, 30 Aug 2006 17:43:16 +0000 http://www.joeydevilla.com/2006/08/30/travel-advisory-for-people-flying-to-the-british-isles/#comment-8109 all the better to stab your way into the cabin, eh? terrorist!!! all the better to stab your way into the cabin, eh? terrorist!!!

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