Patrick Lee pointed me to this Nerve story (some of the ads on the page might not be safe for work): Sex Advice from Accordion Players!
My only complaint about the article is that they didn’t invite me to contribute!
The Adventures of Accordion Guy in the 21st Century
Joey deVilla’s Personal Blog
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About "Accordion Guy"
Back in high school, after reading Space-Time and Beyond for the umpteenth time and drinking one too many zombies with my friend Henry, we came up with a theory:
In the infinite set of universes, there had to exist a particular universe in which the events in our lives were being watched as a TV show.
We then made a solemn vow to live the kind of life that got high ratings.
This is the continuation of that story.
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Why not contribute here? Answer the following:
What’s the best music for putting you in the mood?
What’s the hottest non-porn movie to impress a date with?
How has being an accordion player improved your sexual technique?
Is there a type of girl that goes for accordion players?
How much masturbation is too much masturbation?
What’s a good way to get someone up to your apartment?
What’s a first-date dealbreaker?
What’s the best thing anyone has ever done to you in bed?
Joey, what the heck is the guy on the right holding?
Notice the absence of bellows? You probably blow into that nozzle thing on the top, like a melodica…
And it’s called a claviola:
http://www.oneringzero.com/claviola.html
I hadn’t noticed the mouthpiece at first. Thanks.